I smoked some weed and I feel fine. I went to see the waterfalls and was gone an hour and a half from work. What a privilege to be honest. This certainly doesn’t happen to anyone…I need to count my blessings. It’s essential.

After that, I went to have ice cream with my friend and then I went to the gym. The rain was coming down hard at one point…I was sitting in the chairs waiting for it to get better. There was a guy who was jacked and decided to take his shirt off and run to his car. Ugh. Amazing. I definitely feel that I miss being able to sleep with whoever I want. I have to remember that such life brings nothing but drama, deceit, and potentially doom. At the rate that I was going, something bad could have happened to me. That I know. But he came to rescue me at the right time. It’s amazing and funny how life works. But still. I think that the reason I binge watch porn sometimes is because I am living my whore life through the porn. I just don’t want to be always watching it. It’s gone down to twice a week now, which is not bad at all. I have to watch it. I really do. I don’t want anything to become a bad habit. It’s controlled now and I’m very glad.

Anyway. Another weekend of rain. But next weekend will be good, so I have to decide if I want to go to the beach or Vermont. Time will tell.

I’m glad another week is finally over. I finished all of my work and have nothing really outstanding. Fridays are usually my days to get everything done that I have during the week.

I really hope that my patience of paying off school pays off soon. I have been very patient…maybe for too long. But there is nothing more important to me than to pay off this debt and never have to worry about it again.

More later. I thought that tomorrow would be the last day of the month, but it is today. Tomorrow is July…and that is another month that has gone and brings us closer to Winter…the end of the year…and the eventual end. It’s bothersome. It really is. So I guess just cherish every single second. Although I will always believe, no matter what anyone tells me, that there has GOT to be something behind all of this existence and Universe. Beyond comprehension, but I believe that there is really something more than meets the eye.  I could complain about how boring my life is or count the blessings and accept them for who they are. I have a relatively very easy life, and for that I am forever grateful.

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