In the past week, my eye have been opened wider. As I get older and the years go by, my eye lids become wider. And at the same time, the ultimate cosmic joke is being played on me. It is too real to be a coincidence…too satirical. You see, I used to act like an elitist, even though I am not, and criticize my brother’s girlfriend for numerous reasons. These reasons are not relevant and will not be discussed in detail, but let it be stated that most of them revolved around the fact that she is different in the way my family is, dresses, and her lack of sophistication. Now, I have a boyfriend who almost fits into that same criteria. Without going into details, I have learned that my parents are stuck in their old ways, and that, at this age, they will not change. They may perhaps, tolerate things, but will never be fully accepting. Isn’t that typical of foreign parents? In any case, they cannot and will not fully come to terms with my sexuality. Let it be.
At the same time, I have come to realize that what lies within is the most important aspect of all. The way a person treats you cannot be put a price. I still retain basic values, and as long as we work together to do things that both enjoy, it will be worth it to me. My hope is that, in time, we will rub off on each other and that the relationship will be successful. The future cannot be controlled, but the present can be. And I am doing everything in my power to try and cultivate a better future by acting in the present time. There will always be aspirations, and there will always be a hope that Karma is going to resolve the situations that are out of our control.
I will always love my parents, but I do not agree with all of the grief that they have put their two children through when it comes to following cultural norms. That era is dead…we live in a different country now. Things have changed. They had a chance to live their life (a good one, all things considered), but now, it is time to let their two children live theirs. I will continue to place high importance on both sides; my family and my partner. I will do everything that I can in order to satisfy the emotional and social needs of both; but I cannot promise one or the other that this will always be the case. As long as both parties are understanding of each other’s needs…

I am debating on whether to do a yearly address tomorrow. Before this horrible year comes to a close…maybe it would be beneficial to let it all out, once and for all, collectively, and never look back.

 

 

 

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