Here we are, once again, the even before my hiv test. This is an all too familiar road for me. How do I feel? Anxiety, fear, and an uneasy calmness. There is not much I can do but to wait. After 90 days, this is finally it. It was easy to put it in the back of my mind back then. You see, I had to fill my life with activities. There was nothing I could do but to wait. And I did wait. Because it was so far away, it was easy for me to put it in the back of my mind. But now, with less than 20 hours to go, it is something that I can no longer ignore. Tomorrow, I will know the answer. I find it interesting but admirable that I did not have an absolute mental break down because of this. For that, I give myself an immense amount of credit. Regardless of the outcome, I have come out stronger. There isn’t much I have left to say. Let fate take its course, and so it shall. Today, tomorrow, and the days after.

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